Longing

My heart still beats, I can't will it to stop
Death doesn't come just because you want it to
Yet I feel such amazing pain, so much dispair
I want to visit death, I need to be done
I no longer trust and I no longer dream
Life no longer attracts or intrests me
I am ready for the final breath, the last thought
I want it all to end and I don't want to wake
I am tired and I need to sleep